<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Transitional//EN" "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-transitional.dtd"> <html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="cs" lang="en"> <head> <meta name="google-site-verification" content="YR-PlaJ50gl-Q5QbRX1tlzRvyuVisAP4Qgh8IqMx0dU" /> <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8" /> <title>Mississippi Friends</title> <meta content="Magnolias and Live Oaks, Southern Culture, Civil War Archives, CSA Soldiers, Uniforms, Recipes, Mississippi, Fashion, Humor, CSA Currency, Heritage" name="keywords" /> <meta content="Southern Thinking, Magnolias and Live Oaks, Southern Culture, History, Heritage, Fashion, Humor, CSA Currency, Uniforms" name="description" /> <meta name="copyright" lang="en" content="" xml:lang="en" /> <meta name="robots" content="all,follow" /> <script src="/js_liveclock.js" type="text/javascript"> </script> <style type="text/css"> /*<![CDATA[*/ <!-- body { scrollbar-face-color:#A5B59C; scrollbar-highlight-color:#6c5533; scrollbar-3dlight-color:#000000; scrollbar-darkshadow-color:#000000; scrollbar-shadow-color:#FFFFFF; scrollbar-arrow-color:#000000; scrollbar-track-color:#C4CABC; } --> /*]]>*/ </style> <style type="text/css"> /*<![CDATA[*/ <!-- html { scrollbar-face-color:#A5B59C; scrollbar-highlight-color:#6c5533; scrollbar-3dlight-color:#000000; scrollbar-darkshadow-color:#000000; scrollbar-shadow-color:#FFFFFF; scrollbar-arrow-color:#000000; scrollbar-track-color:#C4CABC; } --> /*]]>*/ </style> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://ajax.googleapis.com/ajax/libs/jquery/1.3.2/jquery.min.js"> </script> <script type="text/javascript" src="/scrolltopcontrol.js"> //<![CDATA[ /*********************************************** * Scroll To Top Control script- ) Dynamic Drive DHTML code library (www.dynamicdrive.com) * This notice MUST stay intact for legal use * Visit Project Page at http://www.dynamicdrive.com for full source code ***********************************************/ //]]> </script> <style type="text/css"> /*<![CDATA[*/ li.c1 {list-style: none} span.c1 {font-size: 10px; color: #3D3B32; text-decoration: none; padding: 2px; text-align: left;float:right; } /*]]>*/ </style> <link href="/css/mississippi.css" type="text/css" rel="stylesheet" media="screen,projection" /> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://ajax.googleapis.com/ajax/libs/jquery/1.3.2/jquery.min.js"> </script> <script type="text/javascript" src="/scrolltopcontrol.js"> //<![CDATA[ /*********************************************** * Scroll To Top Control script- ) Dynamic Drive DHTML code library (www.dynamicdrive.com) * This notice MUST stay intact for legal use * Visit Project Page at http://www.dynamicdrive.com for full source code ***********************************************/ //]]> </script> </head> <body> <!-- Layout --> <div id="layout"> <div id="header"></div> <div id="container"> <div class="content"> <div class="intro intro-in"> <h1>MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS</h1> <ul> <li>Friends - Never ask for food</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Are the reason you have no food.</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Call your parents Mom and Dad.</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Will be sitting next to you saying, D**n... that was fun!"</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Have never seen you cry.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Cry with you.</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Borrow your stuff for a few days, then give it back.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours.</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Know a few things about you.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Can write a book with direct quotes <em>from</em> you.</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Will leave you behind, if that's what the rest of the crowd is doing.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Will whoop the whole crowd that left you.</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Knock on your door.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Walk right in and holler, "Hey y'all! Anybody ta' home?"</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Are for a while.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Are for life.</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say,<br /> "You better drink the rest of that, you know we don't waste!!"</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Friends - Will talk smack to the person who talks smack about you.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Will knock them on their a**!!.</li> <li class="c1"><br /></li> <li>Other Friends - Will ignore this.</li> <li class="c1">MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS - Will send this to their MISSISSIPPI FRIENDS.</li> </ul> <br /> <img src="/images/divider.gif" width="575" height="14" alt="" class="center" /> <br /> <h2>Mississippians</h2> <p class="c1">if..... </p> <p class="c1">You can properly pronounce Neshoba, Chata, Nanih Waiya, Shuqualak, DeKalb, Kosciusko, Decatur, Yazoo, Pascagoula, Picayune, and Scooba. <br /> <br /> A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel. <br /> <br /> Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway. <br /> <br /> You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day. <br /> <br /> You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade. <br /> <br /> You know stores don't have bags, they have sacks. <br /> <br /> You see people wear bib overalls at funerals. <br /> <br /> You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent. <br /> <br /> You measure distance in minutes. <br /> <br /> You only serve 'Little Smokies' for special occasions. <br /> <br /> You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit. <br /> <br /> Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date. <br /> <br /> A bad traffic jam involves two drivers staring each other down at a four-way stop, each determined to be the most polite and let the other go first. <br /> <br /> You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store. <br /> <br /> Your "place at the lake" has wheels under it. <br /> <br /> A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol. A Chevy Silverado Extended Bed, Crew Cab is... <br /> <br /> You know everything goes better with Ranch. <br /> <br /> You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply. <br /> <br /> You actually get these jokes and are "fixin' " to send them to your friends. <br /> <br /> Finally, you are 100% Mississippian if you have ever heard or had this conversation: <br /> "You wanna coke?" <br />"Yeah." <br />"What kind?" <br />"Dr. Pepper."</p> <br /> <img src="/images/divider.gif" width="575" height="14" alt="" class="center" /> <br /> <p class="c1">You Should Know...</p> <ul> <li>How do you know when you're staying in a Mississippi hotel?<br /> When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink," and the clerk replies, "Go ahead."</li> <li class="c1"><br /> <br /></li> <li>How can you tell if a Mississippi redneck is married?<br /> There's dried tobacco juice on both sides of his pickup truck.</li> <li class="c1"><br /> <br /></li> <li>Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age in Mississippi to 32?<br /> It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools.</li> <li class="c1"><br /> <br /></li> <li>What do they call reruns of "Hee Haw" in Mississippi?<br /> Documentaries.</li> <li class="c1"><br /> <br /></li> <li>Did you know a Mississippian invented the <em>tooth</em>brush?<br /> If it had been invented anywhere else, it would have been called a <em>teeth</em>brush.</li> <li class="c1"><br /> <br /></li> <li>A Mississippi State trooper pulls over a pickup on I-55 and says to the driver, "Got any I.D.?"<br /> ... he asks, "Bout wut?"</li> <li class="c1"><br /> <br /></li> <li>Did you hear about the $3 million Mississippi State Lottery? (Come on -- this is funny!)<br /> The winner gets $3.00 a year for a million years.</li> <li class="c1"><br /> <br /></li> <li>The governor's mansion in Mississippi burned down!<br /> Yep. Pert' near took out the whole trailer park. The library was a total loss, too.<br /> Both books- POOF - up in flames, and he hadn't even finished coloring one of them.</li> </ul> <br /> <p class="c1">A guy walks into a bar in Tupelo and orders a mudslide. <br /> The bartender looks at the man and says, "Y'all ain't from 'roun here are ya'?" <br /> "No", replies the man, "I'm from Pennsylvania." <br /> The bartender looks at him and says, "Well, what do ya' do in Pennsylvania?" <br /> "I'm a taxidermist", said the man. <br /> The bartender, looking very bewildered now, asks, "What in the world is a tax-e-derm-ist? <br />The man says, "I mount animals." <br /> The bartender stands back and hollers to the whole bar... <br /> "It's okay boys, he's one of us!"</p> <br /> <img src="/images/divider.gif" width="575" height="14" alt="" class="center" /> <br /> <div class="box" id="nav"> <ul> <li id="active"><a href="http://www.angelpig.org/">Home</a></li> <li><a href="/sitemenu.html">Site Menu</a></li> <li> 1997-Present: Collected &amp; Arranged by AngelS</li> </ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div id="footer"> </div> <!-- NO COPY--> <script type="text/javascript"> //<![CDATA[ //Disable select-text script (IE4+, NS6+)- By Andy Scott //Exclusive permission granted to Dynamic Drive to feature script //Visit http://www.dynamicdrive.com for this script function disableselect(e){ return false } function reEnable(){ return true } //if IE4+ document.onselectstart=new Function ("return false") //if NS6 if (window.sidebar){ document.onmousedown=disableselect document.onclick=reEnable } //]]> </script><!--NO COPY--> <!--NO CLICK--> <script type="text/javascript"> //<![CDATA[ <!-- //Disable right mouse click Script //By Maximus (maximus@nsimail.com) //For full source code, visit http://www.dynamicdrive.com var message=""; /////////////////////////////////// function clickIE() {if (document.all) {alert(message);return false;}} function clickNS(e) {if (document.layers||(document.getElementById&&!document.all)) { if (e.which==2||e.which==3) {alert(message);return false;}}} if (document.layers) {document.captureEvents(Event.MOUSEDOWN);document.onmousedown=clickNS;} else{document.onmouseup=clickNS;document.oncontextmenu=clickIE;} document.oncontextmenu=new Function("return false") // --> //]]> </script><!--NO CLICK--> </body> </html>